"Everybody's Working for the Weekend...."
These lyrics are taking on a painstaking reality for me the last few weeks, and I am guessing for some time to come. The in's and out's of each day begin to run together, and feel the same.
Get up, get ready, get the baby ready, get food ready, drop off, work, pick-up, feed teh baby, bathe the baby, nurse the baby, bed time, feed yourself, get caught up, catch some Zzzz's.
I fear that I am missing out on little moments. Scratch that. I KNOW I am missing out on little moments. Because Matilda is in daycare 8 hours a day. And because the time I have during the week is miniscule.
I put all this pressure on making the weekends feel special. I try to hang on every moment. And I constantly question whether or not I am getting everything I can out of each and every moment. The outcome is living in the past and not the now.
I know this will be a forever battle with my self. My working self. My mom self. My working mom self.
So, now I am trying to savor the little things. Like every day when I shut the trunk door of the car after getting all of the bags packed up and go to open Matilda's door to get her out, she is already giving me the BIGGEST smile and kicking those little feet because she knows what's coming: a kiss on the nose from mama.